


fuck

by kawaiidonut



Category: DRAMAtical Murder - All Media Types
Genre: (child ren not children), Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, DJ!aoba, M/M, Trans Male Character, aoba is trans, child!ren
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-29
Updated: 2016-03-18
Packaged: 2018-05-03 22:49:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5309969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kawaiidonut/pseuds/kawaiidonut
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>in which clear and aoba's relationship begins with a bang</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> yo uh. this fandom does not have enough trans!aoba and i figured hey. uh. why not (why not) take a crazy chance. why not (why not) do a crazy dance. if you lose a moment. you might lose a lot. so why not. why not.
> 
> i hope you guys like this. you may have noticed that i no longer have any concerns for professionalism or for making my work look appealing to potential viewers. that decline started when i wrote an omorashi fic and it has reached its lowest point now that i have literally titled my work "fuck" with no capitalization

Aoba had just finished his shift at the club and he was ready to leave. It had been a good shift, and he had gotten some pretty good tips (which was to be expected -- he was a pretty popular DJ). While his job was fun and he definitely loved what he did, all he wanted to do in that moment was to go home, check on his son and go to bed.

That changed, however, when he spotted a fine piece of ass checking him out from a barstool a few feet away. Aoba tried to seem nonchalant. He leaned against the counter, looking around the room in a way that he hoped seemed calm and collected. When he glanced back at the man, he caught his eye. Then the man smiled. Aoba took a deep breath and sauntered over.

“What are you looking at?” Aoba asked with a smile that softened the harshness of his words.

“You,” the man answered. He patted the stool beside him and said, “Sit down. Let me buy you a drink.”

“Well, since you asked so nicely,” Aoba mumbled sarcastically, though he sat down anyway. He told the bartender what he wanted and downed nearly half of his drink once he got it.

“What’s your name? Your real name, I mean.”

“It’s Aoba.” Aoba went by a stage name when he worked. The clubgoers knew him as Sly Blue, and he was usually reluctant to tell them his real name, but something about this guy made Aoba feel like he could trust him. Aoba tossed back the rest of his drink and asked, “What’s yours?”

“Clear.” He noticed Aoba had finished his drink so he bought him another one.

"What brings you here, Clear? Are you a frequent customer?"

"No. I had some time to myself and I wanted to check the place out." He flashed Aoba a grin. "It looks like I came on the right night!"

Aoba chuckled. Clear was really charming. He looked kind of nerdy -- he was wearing a cardigan over a button-up shirt; who dressed like that to go to a club? -- but he was cute. Aoba was digging the whole albino thing he had going on.

Four drinks later, Aoba found himself in the back of a cab on the way to Clear’s apartment with his tongue halfway down Clear's throat. How exactly they had ended up in bed together was a bit of a blur, but Aoba remembered quite clearly how he had spent three straight hours in heaven while Clear fucked him in every way imaginable.

The next morning, Aoba woke up with a terrible headache. He opened his eyes and saw an unfamiliar bedroom which seemed a lot more well-kept than his own. After a moment of confusion, he remembered what he had done the night before, and he looked around the room for his temporary partner. He found that he was alone, though, so he crawled out of bed and searched the room for his clothes.

Once he was dressed and had checked his appearance in the mirror, he followed the sound of sizzling until he found the homeowner in the kitchen, apparently cooking something. What was his name again? Clarence? Clive?

Cledith noticed Aoba and grinned. “Oh, Aoba-san, you’re up! Good morning!”

“Uh…” Aoba mumbled. “Yeah. What’s all this?”

Clayton flipped something in the pan with a spatula. “I figured you would be hungry after last night, so I thought I would make breakfast!”

Aoba shuffled his feet. “Um. T-Thank you. But, um, I should really get home. I have...someone waiting for me.”

“Oh.” Clark’s brow furrowed and he turned the stove off. “You have someone waiting for you?”

“N-Not like that! Not...um…” Aoba cleared his throat. “I have a son at home. I hired a babysitter, but I don’t know whether he left last night or if he stayed. My son could be all by himself right now, and he gets really easily anxious and upset and he's probably worried sick about me." He laughed without humour. "My _son,_ my _eight-year-old son_ is probably _worried sick_ about _me,_ his _father._ This was really stupid and irresponsible and I need to go home now.”

Cleveland nodded slowly. “I understand. Can I at least drive you home?”

Aoba looked at his feet. “That would be nice. Thank you.”

The car ride was very quiet. Aoba wanted to say something, but he couldn't think of anything. He didn't usually have one-night-stands and he didn't know what the proper etiquette was, so he ultimately decided to keep his mouth shut. There was no sense in making an uncomfortable situation worse.

“Here we are,” Clifford said as he stopped the car in front of Aoba’s house.

“Thanks again.”

“No problem at all. It was nice meeting you, Aoba-san.”

“Yeah, you too...um...er…”

“Clear.” He laughed. “My name is Clear. I’m surprised you forgot it.”

Aoba’s face burned as the implications of Clear’s statement sunk in. “Right. Nice meeting you, too, Clear.”

“Maybe we’ll run into each other again.”

Aoba nodded. “Yeah. Maybe.”

*     *     *

Ren came home from school two days later with a note from his teacher.

“What’s this?” Aoba asked, taking the piece of paper from Ren’s small, chubby hand.

“He told me to give it to you.”

In elegant handwriting, the note read:

_“Dear Seragaki-san,_

_Your son, Seragaki Ren-kun, has encountered some difficulties with participation in the classroom. I think the three of us should meet to discuss the problem and determine a possible solution. I have scheduled a time for you two to come see me. If it will not work for you, please contact me at the number listed below._

_Regards,_  
_Kurage-sensei”_

“Am I in trouble, papa?” Ren asked.

Aoba patted his head. “No, sweetheart. He just wants to talk to us.” He knelt down and brushed Ren’s hair away from his face before pressing their foreheads together. “Don’t worry.”

Ren was eight years old. He was Aoba's biological son, and Aoba loved him more than anything else in the world (certainly more than Ren's other biological father loved him). Aoba had been a single parent ever since his partner abandoned them seven years ago. He worried that Ren's anxiety was due to the structure of their household. It was tough supporting a child when you didn't have a college education, so Aoba spent a lot of time working, which meant he had less time to spend with Ren. It made him feel guilty, but there was nothing he could do to help the situation. He hoped that, someday, Ren would understand.

The following afternoon, Aoba knocked on Kurage-sensei’s classroom door, holding Ren's hand tightly. The door opened a moment later.

"Seragaki-san! It's nice to --" The man's voice cut off. Aoba looked up and immediately realized why. Kurage-sensei's warm, fuschia eyes, wide with shock, made a torrent of memories flood Aoba's mind.

_"Oh, Clear, I...!"_

_"You're so beautiful, Aoba-san..."_

Aoba blinked and he felt an intense blush burning his cheeks. There was an awkward silence for a moment until Aoba cleared his throat.

"Um." His voice was shaky. "Hi."

"H-Hello."

All Aoba could think about was the lust Clear had held in his eyes as he had fucked the living daylights out of Aoba merely three nights prior. Aoba cleared his throat again.

"Hi, Kurage-sensei," Ren mumbled. Though his voice was quiet, it was enough to remind Aoba of the context he was in, making him snap back to reality.

Clear must have had the same reaction. He shook his head and stammered, "U-Um. Hello, Ren-kun. Seragaki-san, you and Ren-kun can come in."

"T-Thank you."

They entered the room. Aoba sat in a chair beside the desk. There was another chair beside it, presumably for Ren, but Ren chose to sit in Aoba's lap.

"So, uh, y-you wanted to talk about Ren's...lack of participation in class?"

"Yes, Seragaki-san. You see, Ren-kun is usually --"

"S-Sorry to interrupt, but, uh, you can call me Aoba. You don't need to be so formal."

Clear blinked. "Um. Okay. Um...Aoba-san...as I was saying, Ren-kun is very quiet in class. Is he usually that way?"

"Ren has always been pretty shy. He's never really talked much unless he had to."

Clear nodded slowly, then turned his attention to the little person on Aoba's lap. "So, Ren-kun, do you not see the classroom as a place in which talking is necessary?"

Aoba felt Ren fidget. "I don't know. Most of the time I have nothing valuable to add to the discussion."

"That's where you're wrong, Ren-kun!" Clear grinned and his eyes brightened. "I'm always interested in hearing what you have to say."

Ren looked down at his feet and stayed quiet. Aoba knew he should have been scolding Ren for being impolite, but his voice was stuck in his throat as he looked at Clear's smile. That made him remember the way Clear had smiled at him when Aoba had taken his clothes off, and how warm Clear's arms had been as they had circled around his waist, and how soft Clear's lips had been when he had --

"...Aoba-san? Aoba-san, did you hear me?"

Aoba shook his head. "Um. S-Sorry, I didn't catch that."

Clear laughed. "I said that maybe you could try to help Ren-kun work on his shyness at home." He looked at Ren again. "There is nothing wrong with being shy, but when it makes you begin to doubt yourself, it needs to be addressed. Does that make sense, Ren-kun?"

Ren nodded.

Clear smiled again. "Good. You're not in trouble, Ren-kun. We just want to make sure that you believe in yourself as much as we believe in you."

Ren nodded again.

"That's all I needed to talk to you about! I'll let you go now."

Aoba tried to smile, but he was screaming so hard internally that it came out very tight and forced. "Thanks. It was nice seeing you again --"

_God damn it._

Clear's eyes widened and his face turned red. "U-U-Um."

Ren looked between the two of them curiously. "Papa, do you and Kurage-sensei know each other?"

Aoba bleated out a nervous laugh. He sounded kind of like a goat. "N-No! We've never met before! Don't be silly!"

"But you just said --"

"C'mon, Ren! We're leaving!"

"See you tomorrow, Kurage-sensei..."

Clear was still stammering wordlessly as Aoba dragged Ren out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao i had to give clear a last name so why not kurage?? anyway yeah uh im back at it again


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba just can't seem to shake Clear loose!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i should be studying for a test i have tomorrow but i'm doing this instead lmao

Aoba’s phone was ringing. He knew who was calling and he did not want to answer it.

Clear, Ren’s teacher, had written another note to Aoba asking if he had permission to use his contact information in case he needed to discuss something with him regarding Ren’s progress. Aoba begrudgingly agreed because he knew it was what was best for his son. When he recognized the school’s number on his caller ID, though, he regretted doing it. He did _not_ want to talk to Clear, especially not after what had happened at their meeting last week. But something might have been wrong with Ren, so he steeled his nerves and answered the phone.

“Hello?”

“Yes, hello, Aoba-san. Um, Ren-kun is in a bit of a...situation.”

Aoba paused in confusion. “What kind of situation?”

“He has locked himself in the bathroom and he refuses to come out.”

Aoba covered his face with his hand and sighed. “I’ll be right there.”

“W-What? Aoba-san, is that necessary? I don’t want you to feel like you have to --”

“No, I know what to do when this happens. Tell him I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

“O-Okay.”

Aoba hung up the phone and groaned. Of course he wanted to be there to help his son, but he didn’t want to have to see Clear. All he could do at this point was embarrass himself even further.

When Aoba got to Ren’s school, he headed for Clear’s classroom. His heartbeat was pounding in his ears. He knocked on the door and Clear opened it.

Aoba tried to smile. “Hi.”

Clear blinked. “H-Hi. Um, he’s in the bathroom down the hall. I’ll show you.”

Clear led Aoba into the washroom and knocked on one of the stall doors. “Ren-kun? Your father is here.”

“It’s me, Ren.”

Ren sniffed on the other side of the door.

“I’ll leave you two alone,” Clear whispered. Aoba nodded, and Clear left the room.

“Ren? Please, open the door. It’s alright. I’m here now.”

Ren opened the door and dove towards Aoba, wrapping him up in a hug. Aoba hugged him back.

“Do you want me to sing?” Aoba asked. Ren nodded.

Aoba opened his mouth and started to sing the same lullaby he had used to calm Ren when he was a baby. He gently rocked Ren from side to side as he sang, and by the time he was finished, Ren was much more stable.

“Will you be alright for the rest of the day?" Aoba asked gently. "Do you want to come home?”

Ren shook his head. “I’ll be fine, papa.”

Aoba smiled and patted his head. “Okay. Remember that you can call me whenever you need me and I’ll be there, alright? Even if I’m at work. You’re more important to me that anything.”

Ren smiled and hugged Aoba tighter.

When Aoba led Ren out of the washroom, he was surprised to find Clear waiting there, wringing his hands anxiously.

“Is everything okay now?”

Aoba nodded. “Yeah. He’s gonna be alright.”

Clear smiled and exhaled with relief. “Wonderful! Shall we go back to class, Ren-kun?”

Ren nodded with enthusiasm and stepped over so he was standing beside Clear instead of Aoba.

“Bye, papa.”

“Bye, sweetheart.”

“Thank you for coming, Aoba-san!”

“No problem. Call me whenever he needs me, okay?”

Clear nodded once. “Absolutely. And, um, by the way, Aoba-san…” His cheeks reddened a bit. “You have a lovely singing voice.”

Aoba blushed so hard he could feel his heartbeat in his forehead.

*     *     *

Aoba received another call from the school a few days later. It woke him up from his nap. He was irritated that his sleep had been interrupted, but he knew Clear would only call if it was an emergency, so he answered it.

“Hello?”

"Aoba-san?"

Aoba yawned. "Yeah?"

"There's been an incident with Ren-kun at school. Some of the other students were bullying him. He is very upset and he would like to go home. Are you able to pick him up?"

"Yeah, I can do that. Is he alright?"

"He is still shaken up, but I was able to calm him down."

Aoba yawned again. "Good. Thank you."

"It's my job, Aoba-san." He paused. "Are you -- were you sleeping?"

"Yeah. I worked a late shift last night."

"Oh, right...you work at the..."

"The club. Yeah."

"Right." More silence. "Anyway, um, you should come as soon as possible."

"Yeah! I'll head there right now. Can you...I mean, would you mind staying with him until I get there? He gets really anxious..."

"Of course. I'll make sure he's alright until you arrive."

Aoba smiled because he knew Clear couldn't see it. "Thanks."

"See you soon." The line went dead.

Aoba put on his favourite button-up shirt that brought out his eyes. Not because he wanted to look nice because he was gonna be seeing Clear, or anything. Just because he wanted to. A man could dress up for himself! There was nothing wrong with that!

When Aoba got to the school, Ren ran up and hugged him around the hips. Aoba cradled his head soothingly.

"Are you alright, sweetie?"

Ren didn't move his face away from Aoba's shirt; he just shook his head. Aoba patted his hair.

"Hey, why don't you go get your backpack? Then we can go home, alright?"

Ren nodded and went back into the classroom to get his things. The other kids were still out for recess, so Aoba knew he wouldn't run into any trouble going on his own.

Clear walked over beside him. "I wish there was something I could do to help."

"Are you kidding me? You've helped a ton! You're really good with him."

Clear shrugged. "I have kids of my own, so I know how it feels when your child is upset. It's the worst feeling in the world."

"You're a parent?"

Clear laughed. "Is that surprising?"

"W-Well, I guess not...I mean, you're so good with kids, but..." He swallowed. "I didn't see any kids when I was at your house."

Clear's expression changed to one of realization. "Yes. Right. Um. They were staying at a friend's house. That's why I went out that evening."

"Oh. How old are they?"

"Only a year older than Ren. They're twins; their names are Rei and Ami."

"What do they look like?"

Clear smiled. "I'll show you." He took his phone out and fiddled with it for a second before showing it to Aoba. There were two children on the screen, both with blue eyes and white hair, though one had it in pigtails.

"They're very cute," Aoba noted.

"Thank you." He put his phone away and sighed. "They're not, um...they were my brother's, but he and his wife were killed in a car accident and we had no other family, so I took them under my care." He shrugged. "They were only a few months old when it happened, though, so I've practically raised them since birth."

"I'm so sorry about your brother and his wife," Aoba said softly. "That's awful."

Clear nodded with a grim expression. "Yes. They were very young."

"I know what it's like to be a single parent, though. Ren's father -- his other father, I mean -- isn't in the picture anymore." Aoba paused. "He, um, cheated on me, I think, and left me to take care of Ren by myself. I haven't heard from him since."

"That's horrible, Aoba-san. I'm sorry to hear it."

“Yeah.” Aoba paused. “Um, so, I dunno if you’ve noticed, but Ren doesn’t really have any friends…”

Clear nodded. “I have noticed that he spends a lot of time by himself at school.”

“Yeah. So I think it might help him if he was able to develop his social skills, and, um...well, you said your kids are around Ren’s age…”

“You want to arrange a play date to see if Ren might get along with my children?”

“If it isn’t too much trouble, yeah,” Aoba admitted.

Clear smiled. “That sounds like a great idea!"

They arranged a time for Aoba to bring Ren over that weekend. When Aoba took Ren home and told him about their upcoming plans, Ren seemed nonplussed. Aoba hated to think that he was forcing his son into an uncomfortable situation, but he figured it would be good for Ren to step outside his comfort zone. It wasn't like he was putting Ren in any real danger, and if anything went wrong, Clear would be there to help. Ren would be fine. Aoba needed to stop worrying.

That evening, when Aoba was about to head to work, Ren clung to his legs, preventing him from walking out the door.

"Ren, sweetheart, I'm gonna be late if you don't let me go," Aoba said with a laugh. It took five whole minutes to get Ren to release him.

As he rode the bus to work, Aoba wondered if the reason Ren kept having incidents at school was because he wanted Aoba's attention. He wondered if Ren felt that he wasn't getting enough attention at home. He wondered if he really was a bad parent.

He couldn't focus as much as he usually could at his job. He reverted to his classic set, the one he knew was a crowd favourite, so he wouldn't have to worry too much about making tips.

It was a good thing he decided to choose a set that didn't require much effort because his phone started to buzz in his pocket halfway through. It could have been the babysitter calling to say something was wrong. Aoba’s employers knew he was a single parent, and they understood that Ren was his number one priority, so he knew he wouldn’t get in trouble for answering his phone.

"How are you guys feeling tonight?" Aoba asked the crowd. He received several cheers and hollers in response. He announced that the next song was for all the single ladies in the house, which was met with even more cheers and applause. He set the system to play the next few songs automatically and left his post for a moment to deal with the situation.

He pulled his phone out of his pocket once he was backstage and answered it.

“Hello?”

“Aoba-san?”

It was Clear. What the hell?

“Uh...hi?”

“Oh, I just wanted to leave a message! I didn’t think you would answer your phone this late. Did I wake you?”

“No, I’m at work. Do you mind if I call you back tomorrow?”

“You can call me when your shift is over. I’ll be up.”

Aoba agreed to do so, then ended the call and went back to work.

When his shift was over and he was waiting at the bus stop in the chilly November air, he called Clear back, not expecting to receive an answer. It was past three in the morning.

Clear picked up after two rings. “Hello?”

Aoba's eyes widened. “Oh my God, you’re still up?! Why aren’t you in bed?”

“I’m not at home.”

“Where are you? Is something wrong?”

"No, everything's fine! I just...my kids went to a friend's house again, and I didn't want to sit at home alone, so I’ve just been driving around." He paused. “What are you doing?”

“Waiting for the bus.”

“Do the buses run this late?”

“Yeah. The last one comes at three-thirty; that’s the one I take.”

“That’s not for another twenty minutes. Won’t you get cold?”

“I’m alright.”

Clear was silent for a moment. “I’ll come pick you up.”

“W-What? Clear, no, really! I’m okay!”

“Too late! I’m already driving.”

“Don’t drive while you’re on the phone!" Aoba barked. "That’s dangerous!”

“I have one of those fancy new cars where you can plug your phone in so you don’t have to use your hands.”

Aoba grumbled wordlessly. It really was frigid outside, though, and the jacket he had on was thin. Clear was offering so insistently that it would almost be rude for Aoba to say no, so he didn’t argue any further.

“So what did you want to talk to me about earlier?” Aoba asked, trying not to let Clear hear how hard his teeth were chattering.

“I’ll tell you once you get in the car. I’m rounding the corner right now.”

Aoba turned and saw Clear’s headlights. He hung up, then smiled and waved with the hand not holding his phone. Clear pulled up and Aoba got in the car (which he noted was delightfully warm).

“Oh my gosh, Aoba-san, you must be freezing!”

Aoba was about to say something when he felt a length of soft, warm fabric loop around his neck. It had a comforting scent that Aoba eventually recognized as the smell of Clear’s bedsheets.

“Is that better?” Clear asked.

Aoba looked down and saw that Clear had wrapped him in a lemon-yellow scarf. “Yeah, it’s warm. Thanks.”

Clear smiled and looked at Aoba for a moment. Then he started driving.

Aoba was confused. He had been the one to dismiss Clear’s (admittedly very sweet) gestures the morning after their little tryst, and he had been the one that chose to pretend that nothing had happened between them when they bumped into each other again, so why the hell was he getting butterflies just _sitting_ here next to Clear? Why did he feel giddy each time he inhaled the warm scent of vanilla and fabric softener that emanated from the scarf around his neck? Why did he want to feel Clear’s lips against his own one more time?

Aoba shook his head to clear his thoughts. “So, tell me. Why did you call me earlier? Is it about Ren?”

"Um, kind of." Clear scratched his neck. "I just wanted to let you know that when you bring him over on Saturday, you're welcome to stay, too, if you want."

Aoba blinked. "Really?"

"A-As long as you're not busy. I just think it might be better, in case Ren gets upset, for him to have you there. It will help him feel more comfortable."

"Right. Yeah, that makes sense. I'll stay, too."

Clear smiled. "And maybe, if our kids are friends, it would be good if...we could be friends, too."

_Friends?_

Aoba ignored his negative feelings and nodded. "Yeah. I agree. Closer bonds and all that."

"Exactly!" Clear grinned.

Clear wanted to be friends. That was good; it would provide a good example of a healthy friendship for Ren to follow. And since Clear and Aoba were two of the most influential adults in Ren's life right now, seeing the two of them getting along would be especially effective. It would be in everyone’s best interest if they put the past behind them and moved forward, but... Aoba couldn't stop thinking about Clear's body and the way it felt pressed up against his own as they had writhed together in heated passion. He didn't want to pretend that had never happened. He wanted to give Clear the chance he had taken away from him that morning when he had left without so much as a smile.

"Thank you for taking me home," Aoba said before getting out of the car. "You really didn't have to do that."

Clear smiled fondly. "I didn't mind. That's what friends are for, Aoba-san."

It was only after Clear had drove away that Aoba realized he was still wearing his scarf.

As Aoba tried to fall asleep that night, he curled up with Clear's scarf and tried to remember how it had felt when he had snuggled with Clear in his bed. He could almost feel the way Clear’s arms had held him tenderly around the waist as they shared each other’s warmth, and he could almost pretend that his own cold, empty bed was the same one that he had felt so comfortable in. He almost managed to fall asleep with a smile on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sometimes i ask myself why i cant just make clear and aoba get together with no complications but then i realize how boring of a story that would be lol


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba and Clear go on a date??? Maybe???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dont worry this chapter is very sweet and fluffy and not angsty at all :) you can trust your ol pal pancake :) when have i ever made clear and aoba suffer??? :) :) :)

Aoba was wearing cologne. He was taking his son to a play date and he was wearing _cologne._ He felt pathetic.

"Are you excited to meet Kurage-sensei's daughters? He said they're very excited to meet you," Aoba whispered to Ren as they rode the bus.

"I guess," Ren mumbled. "I hope they're nice."

When they got to Clear's apartment, Clear answered the door with a blinding grin.

"Aoba-san and Ren-kun! It's so nice to see you!" He stepped aside to let them in.

"Hi, Kurage-sensei," Ren murmured.

"Thanks for having us over," Aoba said.

"Thank you for coming!" Clear replied. Then he looked at Aoba's shirt and chuckled. "Aoba-san, we match."

Aoba looked down. He was wearing a navy blue turtleneck sweater and khakis. Clear was wearing the same thing. Awkward.

Ren was trying to hide behind Aoba's legs, but he was eventually snatched by two little girls who dragged him away.

Aoba chuckled as his son was abducted by two of the cutest kids he had ever seen (aside from his own, of course). Clear laughed, too.

"Hey, uh, I brought your scarf," Aoba said, holding the scarf up for Clear to see. Clear took it from him.

"You could have kept it, you know," he said with his eyes on the fabric. "It looks better on you, anyway."

Clear led Aoba into the living room and they sat down. The two of them chatted idly for a while. 

An hour later, Rei and Ami brought Ren out for their respective parents to see. He was dressed in a purple skirt and there was makeup smeared on his face. Several glittery butterfly barrettes adorned his hair.

Aoba gasped and opened the camera app on his phone to take a picture. Ren was adorable!

"Ren-kun!" Clear exclaimed, holding his hands over his heart. "You look so cute!"

"R-Really?" Ren asked quietly.

Ami swatted him on the arm. "My daddy wouldn't lie, stupid!"

"Hey!" Clear barked. "You shouldn't treat Ren-kun like that. You should apologize."

Ami ducked her head. Her pigtails bounced with the movement. "Sorry, Ren-kun."

"It's okay."

The three children went back into the playroom, probably to experiment with some new looks.

While their kids played, Aoba and Clear talked about work and their kids and what they did in their spare time. Most of it was pretty mundane, but every word Clear said only served to make Aoba more crazy about him. It was torture.

After a while, the children started to chase each other around the house. They all had toy swords and they occasionally stopped to hit each other with them. Aoba couldn't help but smile as he watched Ren having fun. He glanced at Clear and noticed that he was grinning, too.

On their way home, Ren asked Aoba if they could go to Kurage-sensei's house every weekend. Aoba said he had no problem with that at all.

*     *     *

Clear had been calling Aoba practically every day with news of Ren getting upset. Each time, Aoba had to go to the school. The first time, he ended up staying for a few minutes after he had calmed Ren down because Clear wanted to talk to him about a TV show they both liked. The second time, it had happened right before lunch, so Aoba decided to stay and keep Clear company during his break. The third time and the fourth time and every time after that, there always seemed to be a reason for Aoba to linger, even after he had helped Ren feel better.

Weeks went by where Aoba saw Clear nearly every day, especially since their children had hit it off and they always wanted to play together. One day when Ren was particularly upset, Aoba came to pick him up. Ren was a lot more shaky and nervous than he usually was. Aoba hated to think it, but it seemed kind of put-on. Just as they were about to leave, Ren's eyes widened and he looked around him for something.

“Wait, I...forgot my book. I’ll be right back,” Ren said before heading back towards the classroom.

"I'm sorry, Aoba-san," Clear said quietly. "I know you need to sleep during the day because you work at night. I wish I was able to help Ren-kun calm down on my own without needing to call you."

"It's okay, Clear. He's my son. It's not your job -- well, I mean, it is," he said with a chuckle, "But it's not really your job to talk someone else's kid down from a panic attack."

"Still. I know you have enough to deal with already."

Aoba nodded noncommittally. They fell silent. What was taking Ren so long?

"So, um, Aoba-san," Clear said hesitantly.

"Yeah?"

"Um. I was planning on going to an art gallery with a coworker this Saturday so I bought two tickets, but they ended up being busy, s-so, um...I wondered if, maybe, y-you would...want to...go with me. If you're not busy. No pressure, though. It's not a big deal if you can't. But. Um. Well. We're f-friends, so I thought I would at least ask you. Because we're friends. And. Um. Friends usually do t-things together. Things like that. Um. And we don't always have t-to see each other when our kids are around. You know? We can. Um. We can do things on our own. Right? N-Not that I don't like seeing you when our kids are around, b-but --"

"Clear," Aoba said, cutting him off, "I get it. I'll go with you."

"R-Really?"

"Yeah."

Clear laughed. It sounded half-anxious and half-relieved. "Great. Okay. So I'll pick you up around 7, then?"

Aoba nodded. "Do you, um, remember where I live?"

"Yes, I do. Should I give you my number? In case you need to contact me, or something?"

Aoba tried to stifle a smile but it didn't work. "Sure." He handed his phone over and let Clear type it in. Clear handed it back, and Aoba put it away in his pocket.

"So, um, I guess I'll see you on Saturday? That is, um, unless something else happens before then. Hopefully nothing does. N-Not because I don't want to see you, but because I usually see you when something happens to Ren-kun, and I don't want him to run into trouble because he is only a child and he does not deserve all of the stress he had to deal with --"

"Clear, it's alright. I understand."

Clear breathed out another anxious-relieved laugh.

From behind the classroom wall, Ren smiled. His plan had succeeded.

 *     *     *

"Koujaku? I need a favour."

Koujaku sighed over the phone. "What is it? Do you need me to watch Ren?"

"Yeah, I do. I'd just hire the same babysitter I always do, but I don't know when I'll be home by. Also, Ren is a lot more comfortable being around you."

"What's that punk's name again? Noose? He's always listening to techno music. I hate it. Why do you keep hiring him?"

"Noiz," Aoba corrected. "And I know you hate him, but ever since the club fired him, he's had trouble finding a job. So can you do it? Please?"

Koujaku sighed. "Yeah. Why not? I have nothing going on in my life." He paused. "Why are you going out?"

"Um, I think I'm going on a date."

"You think you're going on a date?"

"Yeah, uh, we've been friends for a while, but we...already slept together. That's how we met. And he asked me to go to an art gallery with him on Saturday, and he was really nervous when he asked, so I think it's a date?"

"Oh. Yeah, that sounds like a date. Don't call it a date, though."

"Of fucking course not! Why would I do something like that?"

Koujaku laughed. "I'm just looking out for you, man."

At six-fifty-eight on Saturday evening, Aoba heard a knock on his door. Anxiety spiked in his chest and he jumped.

"Um, I guess I'll be going now," Aoba said to the babysitter, handing him the first half of his night's wage. "Call me when Koujaku shows up, okay? You have my number, right?"

"Yep. Swag. Smell ya later."

(Unfortunately, Aoba had forgotten to tell Noiz not to come. Aoba hoped Koujaku wouldn't hate him too much.)

Aoba kissed Ren on the forehead and went to open the door.

"Aoba-san! Good evening!"

Fuck. Clear looked adorable. And...he was wearing a suit! Oh no!

"Uh. Should I change? I feel underdressed."

"You can if you want! I don't mind waiting."

Aoba sprinted to his room, putting his only suit on and tying his hair back in the span of three minutes. Clear was still waiting just inside the front door when he sprinted back.

"Ready?" Clear asked.

"Yeah!" Aoba said, smiling and slightly out of breath. He said goodbye to Ren again and left with Clear.

"Y-You look really good, Aoba-san." Clear stammered once they had got in the car. "Um. I like your hair like that."

Aoba stroked a hand over his ponytail. "Thanks."

"So, um, the art gallery actually isn't until eight-thirty. I meant to tell you beforehand, but I forgot, so, um...do you want to get dinner with me?"

Aoba patted Clear's hand, which was on the gear shift. "Yes. That sounds great."

*     *     *

Partway through their maybe-date, Aoba's phone rang. Aoba apologized to Clear, but the caller ID said it was coming from his house and he needed to answer it. Clear said he didn't mind.

"Aoba?" It was Koujaku and he sounded angry.

"Yeah?"

"Did you tell Noiz not to come tonight?"

"Uh...yes?" (That was a lie.)

"Well, he's here. And he's saying I have to pay him! I fucking hate this little twerp..."

"Watch your language around my son!" Aoba barked.

"He can't hear me."

Aoba rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Tell Noiz I'm paying him, alright? Let him stay. He needs the money. But you have to stay, too, in case he has to leave before I get home."

Koujaku groaned for eight seconds straight, then hung up the phone without saying goodbye.

"Who was that?" Clear asked.

"My friend. He's watching Ren, but I forgot to tell the regular babysitter that he didn't need to come, so they're both there. My friend doesn't like the babysitter."

Clear chuckled. "Sounds like you have quite an eventful life!"

"Eventful?" Aoba snorted. "The most eventful thing that's happened to me in the last _five years_ was when -- um." He paused and laughed awkwardly. "Well. You know."

"I certainly do," Clear mumbled, red-faced.

Aoba eyed the scarf around Clear's neck. It was the same one he had lent to Aoba the night he had picked him up.

"It's cold in here. Can you give me your scarf?" Aoba asked, not really processing his own words until they were already past his lips. By that point, it was too late, and he knew he was blushing.

Clear smiled. "Of course!" He unraveled it and handed it to Aoba across the table. Aoba put it on and he instantly felt a sense of peace wash over him.

"Thanks," Aoba mumbled.

"Don't worry about it. Besides, like I said, it suits you very well."

Aoba looked up and met Clear's gaze. Clear wanted him, too, didn't he? He must have, given the amount he flirted with Aoba on a daily basis.

When they got to the art gallery, Aoba noticed that the theme of the exhibit was flowers. As he and Clear looked around and whispered comments to each other about each painting, Aoba felt really happy. He felt so comfortable around Clear. He wished they could be like this with each other all the time.

After the exhibit, they obviously didn't want to say goodbye to each other, so they went to get coffee. By the time Clear dropped Aoba off at his house, it was past midnight.

"Thank you for inviting me," Aoba said as they stood on his doorstep. "That was very kind of you, and I had a lot of fun."

Clear smiled. "Don't mention it." He then placed his hands on Aoba's waist...

...leaned down...

...and kissed him.

Aoba's eyes fluttered shut and his insides felt like goo. He hugged Clear around the shoulders and tried not to audibly moan. Clear was beautiful and perfect and everything Aoba could have ever asked for. Aoba loved Clear, he realized all of a sudden; he loved Clear and he never wanted to stop kissing him. It was magical.

It _was_ magical, that is, until Clear jerked back after three seconds, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. His eyes were wide, as if he were just now realizing what he was doing.

"O-O-Oh my gosh, Aoba-san, I am so sorry..." His face turned beet red and he looked like he was sweating a little bit. "I should not have..." He paused. "I'm very sorry. Please forgive me."

Aoba shook his head in confusion. "Clear, I'm not upset. I'm not mad at you. I-I...wanted to do that. It wasn't just you."

Clear shook his head, too, and ran a hand through his own hair. "We can't..." He sighed. "Aoba-san, I shouldn't have invited you out tonight. That wasn't fair to you."

"What?"

Clear didn't say anything. His brows were furrowed and his mouth was pressed into a flat line.

"What are you saying?"

Clear sighed. "Aoba-san, we can't have this kind of relationship."

"Why not?" Aoba was getting annoyed.

"Because it's unprofessional! I can't date my student's father!"

"So you can't date me, but _fucking_ me is okay?" Aoba snapped.

Clear's eyes narrowed. "That was a decision we made while we were intoxicated."

"I see," Aoba drawled sarcastically. "It's okay to fuck your student's father, but only if you're _also_ drunk off your ass. You're right; that seems a lot more professional than dating."

Clear grit his teeth. "I'm sorry, Aoba-san, but you cannot change my mind on this."

"Fine," Aoba snarled, taking Clear's scarf off and throwing it at him. "Get the fuck off my porch." He turned and entered his home, slamming the door behind him.

As soon as Aoba was inside, the tears started to flow. He really thought he had found someone who wouldn't desert him. He thought he had found someone he could trust and rely on. In reality, Clear was no different than anyone else. He didn't see Aoba as a priority. Nobody did.

"Aoba? Are you home?" Koujaku whisper-called from the living room. Aoba walked into the room and saw Koujaku sitting on the couch. The room was dark save for the light from the television, which was playing at a low volume. Noiz was asleep on his shoulder.

"I'm gonna go to bed now," Aoba whispered. "You guys can go home."

“Are you crying?”

“It’s okay. I’m fine.”

“Aoba --”

“I’ll tell you about it tomorrow, okay? I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

Koujaku refused to go home because he didn’t want to leave Aoba alone. Aoba didn’t have a spare bedroom, so Koujaku had to stay with Noiz on the couch. Koujaku said he didn’t mind.

Aoba felt numb as he brushed his teeth and got into bed. He had thought Clear was the only person who wouldn’t hurt him, but he ended up crying himself to sleep for the first time since he had met him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> geeettttttttt dunked on!!!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clear tries to explain himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy 2016!!! here's a new chapter with sex in it to celebrate!!!

Aoba hadn't seen Clear since that night. He hadn't told Ren about what had happened, but Ren must have figured out that their "date" hadn't gone very well. Ren had been having a suspicious lack of meltdowns at school lately, and he hadn't asked about seeing Rei and Ami again, so Aoba was content with the idea of never hearing from Clear again until Ren came home with a surprise.

"Papa, there's a note here for you."

Aoba looked down at Ren's homework notebook. On the page, where Ren was pointing, was several lines of Clear's handwriting.

Aoba's hands curled into fists. He didn't want to read it, but his curiosity got the best of him.

_"Aoba-san,_

_I am truly sorry. I was wrong. To prove that, I am now providing written evidence that I, Kurage Clear-sensei, have a giant crush on Seragaki Aoba-san, the father of one of my students. I am also providing proof that I would like to go on a real date with him, after which I will kiss him for real and not break his heart._

_Love,  
Clear"_

Aoba really wanted to smile, but he forced himself not to. He wouldn't allow himself to believe Clear. Eventually, Clear would break his promise and he would crush Aoba's heart. It was inevitable, so why would Aoba let himself be vulnerable in the first place?

He picked up a pencil and wrote in response:

_"Kurage-sensei_

_Please stop leaving these messages._

_Thank you  
Seragaki Aoba"_

The next day, there was another note from Clear.

_"Aoba-san,_

_I did not mean to hurt you, but I did, and I am very sorry. Please give me a chance to explain myself in person. If you still do not accept my apology after that, then I will leave you alone._

_Love,  
Clear"_

"He also said to give this to you," Ren said, handing Aoba a box. Aoba looked inside and saw a large, heart-shaped cookie with the words "I'M SORRY AOBA-SAN" written in blue icing.

Aoba narrowed his eyes at the cookie. It was a sugar cookie -- damn Clear for knowing what his favourite cookie was -- and it looked really good. Clear wouldn't know if he ate it or not, right? It would be a waste _not_ to eat it. He could have given it to Ren, but Ren was a growing child who needed to eat things with nutritional value; he shouldn't give him a cookie the size of his head.

Aoba ate the whole cookie and then loathed himself for six hours.

*     *     *

Aoba's phone rang while Ren was at school a few days later. It was probably Clear calling, and Aoba really didn't want to answer, but he had to. He promised Ren that he would always be there when he needed him.

"Hello?"

"Aoba-san!" Clear sounded...emotional, like he couldn't believe Aoba had picked up the phone.

"Is Ren in trouble?"

"Um, y-yes --"

"Give him the phone."

"But, Aoba-san, I wanted to talk to you about --"

"Give him the phone," Aoba repeated.

Clear sighed. "Okay."

There was silence on the other end for a moment. Then, Aoba heard Ren's voice.

"Papa?"

"Hey, sweetheart. What's going on?"

"I want you to come to the school. I won't be able to calm down until you hug me."

Aoba felt a lump in his throat at Ren's words. After the initial burst of emotion, though, he processed the situation and he frowned. "Are you conspiring with him?"

"W-What do you mean, papa?"

"Are you helping him? Are you being, like, a go-between or something?"

Ren gasped. "Papa! I can't believe you would think that! Do you think I'm making this up?"

Shit. Ren sounded upset! Aoba tried to backpedal. "Uh, no, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I'll be right there, okay, sweetie? I'm sorry."

When Aoba showed up at the school, he walked right past Clear in search for Ren. Clear obviously wasn't having any of that.

"Aoba-san!" He gently tugged Aoba's arm to turn him around.

"Don't fucking touch me," Aoba hissed, swatting Clear's hand away.

"Please, Aoba-san," Clear begged. "Please listen to what I have to say. Not right now, of course, but...please say that you will."

Aoba squeezed his eyes shut and rubbed his temples. "Fine. I'll do it, okay? I'll bring Ren over on Saturday and I'll stay for ten minutes. That better be good enough."

"Thank you so much, Aoba-san," Clear murmured. He sounded very relieved.

"Whatever. Where's my son?"

Clear showed Aoba where Ren was hiding. Aoba got him to come out and then hugged him for a while, humming in his ear until Ren was calm again. He left without saying goodbye to Clear.

*     *     *

Aoba showed up to Clear's house on Saturday with his face set in a deep frown. When Clear let them in, Ren scampered away to play with Rei and Ami, leaving Aoba and Clear alone in the entrance.

Aoba sighed and walked past Clear into the living room, setting the timer on his phone to go off in ten minutes. "Let's get this over with."

Clear sat beside Aoba on the couch, looking very tense and anxious. "Um, Aoba-san. I would like to start off by apologizing for my behaviour. I was wrong and --"

"I know you're sorry."

Clear narrowed his eyes. "Can you please listen to me? If you're only giving me ten minutes, I would appreciate it if you didn't interrupt."

Aoba rolled his eyes but stayed quiet.

"Anyway. As I was saying, I was wrong to push you away, but I have an explanation." He cleared his throat. "Y-You didn't know this before, but I was abandoned as a child and I ended up being adopted by a man whom I considered my grandfather. He was very poor; he barely had enough to sustain himself, let alone me on top of that. But when he heard me say I wanted to be a teacher, he started saving up for me to go to college. He worked so much that he made himself sick. Very sick.

"Before he died, he made me promise to persevere until I achieved what he had worked so hard to help me accomplish. That promise is what made me panic when I kissed you. I feared that I would lose my job and let my grandfather down.

"Since that night, though, I've been thinking a lot about what is most important to me. I was wrong to think that my job was the most important thing in my life. I came to the conclusion that my grandfather would understand me putting my job at risk for someone I care about." He paused. "I’m sorry, Aoba-san. I shouldn’t have pushed you away. I understand if you still don’t forgive me. I only wanted you to hear the whole story before you made a decision.”

Aoba blinked, taking it all in. He felt like he had just been punched in the stomach. “I forgive you, Clear," he whispered, "But I don’t know if I can trust you.”

Clear’s face twisted into a pained smile. “I understand.”

“It’s not -- um, it’s not that I don’t want to, but I’ve been hurt before by people who said they cared about me. It’s hard to let my guard down.”

Clear reached out cautiously and took Aoba’s hand into his own. “Aoba-san, I promise that I will never leave you unless you want me to. I will stay by your side forever, if you’ll have me.”

Aoba was taken aback by the sudden sincerity in Clear’s eyes. His heart fluttered as he realized that Clear actually liked him. A lot. “W-What do you mean?"

“I want to be with you, Aoba-san. I’m serious about this.”

Clear was starting to change Aoba’s mind. Aoba really wanted to be able to open himself up and be vulnerable with Clear, and something about the way Clear was holding his hand told Aoba he could do that. He believed that Clear would take care of him and stay by his side unconditionally.

Still, Aoba remembered how absolutely devastating it had been when Ren's father had left because he had believed all that stuff about him, too. He couldn't just rush headfirst into this without carefully considering the potential consequences.

"I-I need to think about it."

Clear smiled kindly. "Take all the time you need, Aoba-san. I will be here waiting."

(Neither of them were aware that their children were hiding just outside the living room, silently cheering and clapping their hands.)

*     *     *

Aoba had been doing a lot of thinking, and he had decided to give Clear a chance. His feelings for Clear had never gone away, not even when he was mad at him, so it was difficult to find any valid reasons not to. He had Ren's enthusiastic approval, too, which he got by asking him about it the night before:

"Hey, sweetie, I have something I wanna ask you about," Aoba had said to Ren as he tucked him into bed.

"What is it?"

"You know how Clear and I are friends, right?"

"Yes, papa."

Aoba had nodded. "Yeah. So, um, he and I were talking on Saturday and he said he had feelings for me, and I want to give it a chance, so I think I'm gonna ask him to go on a date with me. Are you okay with that?"

"Yes!" Ren's face had lit up and he had thrown his little arms around Aoba's waist, squeezing him with all of his might.

"Wow! You're certainly -- excited."

Ren nodded, rubbing his hair against Aoba's shirt. "You're finally gonna be happy, papa!"

Ren's reaction had taken Aoba aback. "Uh, sweetie, you know I'm more than happy enough with it just being the two of us here, right?"

"I know, papa," Ren had said, "But I know you're lonely. I'm happy that you're gonna have Kurage-sensei to keep you company."

Aoba had clarified that Ren could just call him Clear, now, since he was close enough with him. Ren had shaken his head and said that would be too weird.

Now that Aoba had all of that worked out, all he needed to do was pick up the phone and call Clear! That's all he had to do. It was easy: just pick up the phone and dial Clear's number. Simple.

...He couldn't do it.

"God damn it," Aoba grumbled to himself, glaring at his phone on the table as if he could set it on fire with his eyes.

Taking a deep, deep breath, he picked up his phone and dialled Clear's number without thinking about it.

"Aoba-san?" Clear answered after a few seconds.

Aoba panicked and hung up the phone. He stared at the phone in his hands and tried not to scream. Why had he done that?! Clear was going to think he was so weird!

He redialled Clear's number with anxiety burning high in his gut.

"Aoba-san?" Clear said again with a slight chuckle.

"H-Hey!" _Fuck, that was way too enthusiastic._ Aoba cleared his throat and lowered his voice. "Hey."

"What's going on?"

"Nothing! It's just, um... S-So, I've been thinking about what you said. And, um, I t-think I want to, um, go on a d-date with you? If you s-still want to."

"Really?" Clear said in a quiet voice.

"Y-Yeah."

"You want to go on a date with me?"

Aoba felt his cheeks burning. "Yes."

Clear exhaled a shaky breath. "T-That's...that's great, Aoba-san." He sounded like he was smiling. "When are you free?"

Aoba couldn't help but grin. "I'm free right now."

"You want to go out right now?"

Aoba shrugged even though Clear couldn't see it. "Why not?"

Clear laughed. "Alright. I'll be there in about thirty minutes. Be ready!"

"I will be."

Once the call had ended, Aoba took a moment to squeal to himself in excitement. (Little did he know that on the other end of town, Clear was doing the exact same thing.)

Aoba then realized that Ren would need a babysitter, so he called Koujaku, telling him that his services were needed as soon as possible.

"Is Noiz gonna be there?" Koujaku asked.

"Don't worry," Aoba chuckled. "I didn't call him this time."

"Oh." Koujaku paused, then mumbled, "Could you...maybe...I mean, we worked really well together, and Ren had a lot of fun --"

"Oh my God," Aoba said, cackling. "You have a crush on Noiz!"

"I do not!" Koujaku barked.

Aoba snorted. "I'll call him."

Aoba hung up, then called Noiz and told him he needed him to babysit. Then he sprinted to his bedroom to make himself look as cute as possible in the limited time he was given.

"Papa?" Ren called, peeking his head in as Aoba was combing his hair. "Are you going somewhere?"

"I'm going out with Clear! Koujaku and Noiz are gonna come and stay with you while I'm gone."

Ren grinned. "Yay! I'm happy for you, papa! You and Kurage-sensei are going to get married and our families will join and we'll all live together and then you'll have another baby together!"

Aoba sputtered. "L-Let's not get ahead of ourselves, now!"

The doorbell rang, (thankfully) cutting Ren and Aoba's conversation short.

Aoba opened the door and smiled when he saw Clear presenting him with a bouquet of flowers.

"Hey, Clear."

"Hi, Aoba-san! I didn't know what kind of flowers you liked, so I got you one of every kind."

Aoba took the eclectic bouquet from Clear's hands and looked at it. The gesture was so sweet that he enveloped Clear in a hug and kissed him on the cheek. When they separated, they were both red-faced and bashful, as if they had forgotten they had already seen each other naked. Aoba put the flowers in a vase and then they headed out.

Aoba had no idea where they were going, but he didn’t really care. He looked out the window as Clear drove until they finally stopped at his apartment building. Was Clear seriously just taking Aoba to his apartment so they could have sex? Was that his idea of a real date? Aoba wasn't sure what to think.

As they travelled up to Clear's floor in the elevator, Aoba could feel his heartbeat in his stomach. As much as he wanted Clear again, he was still nervous about having sex with him while sober.

He was a bit surprised when they entered Clear's apartment. There was soft music floating in from somewhere, and several candles were lit. He could see from where he was standing that the dinner table was at least partially set.

"I-I know it doesn't seem like much," Clear mumbled, "But I thought it might be nice to have dinner here instead of going out. That way, we don't have to, um, worry about what people are thinking. It takes some of the pressure off."

Aoba smiled, relieved that his initial assumptions had been wrong. "I like that idea."

"I’m happy to hear that,” Clear said, smiling, too. He tucked a strand of Aoba's hair behind his ear and murmured, “You look really beautiful tonight. Um, well, you actually look really beautiful all the time, but I’m just saying it now.”

Aoba lowered his gaze out of shyness. "Thank you. You look good, too.”

Clear said it would be another half hour before dinner was ready, so he told Aoba to make himself comfortable while he finished setting the table, leaving him alone in the living room. Aoba took the opportunity to snoop around a little bit. He had been to Clear's apartment many times, now, but he hadn't really had the chance to look around.

There were a lot of framed photographs scattered around. Most of them were of Clear's children doing various activities -- building a snowman, playing dress-up, celebrating their birthdays. There were a few of them that included Clear, which were, for the most part, kind of silly. Aoba wondered who had been there to take those pictures.

Only two photos stood out; one of an old man in a lemon-yellow scarf (which Aoba recognized as the one Clear had leant to him), and the other a generic-looking picture of jellyfish. Aoba picked up the jellyfish picture, studying it and wondering what significance it held.

"Are you looking at my pictures?" Clear asked, startling Aoba even though his voice was soft. He jolted out of shock and ended up dropping the frame in his hands. It hit the floor with a shatter.

Aoba cringed. "Oh my God! I'm so sorry! L-Let me clean it up --"

Clear scooped Aoba up in his arms before he could take a step. "I don't want you to step on any broken glass, Aoba-san." He placed Aoba on the couch and left to get a broom.

Aoba watched, feeling guilty, as Clear swept up the mess. "I feel awful."

"Please, Aoba-san, don't worry about it!" Clear waved his hand dismissively. "It wasn't an important photograph. I just liked it, that's all."

Aoba nodded slowly. "You like jellyfish?"

"Yes! They're the most beautiful fish in the sea," Clear said matter-of-factly. “They remind me of you!"

Aoba smiled and coyly ducked his head. “You’re sweet.”

“I mean it!" Clear insisted. He finished sweeping up the pile of glass. He carried the dustpan out of the room, then returned after a few seconds. He sat beside Aoba on the couch.

"I feel bad that I ruined your picture."

"Don't feel bad! I might have been upset had it been a different picture, but that one was not important."

"If you say so."

They fell into a comfortable silence. Aoba racked his brain for conversation topics, but he was pulled out of his thoughts when he felt Clear tracing lines over Aoba's forearm with his finger. Aoba turned his palm up, and Clear slid his hand over Aoba's, lacing their fingers together. Aoba looked up to Clear's face, finding him gazing down at him fondly.

"You have very pretty eyes, Aoba-san," he murmured.

Aoba couldn't help but smile. He brought his other hand up to Clear's face and stroked his thumb under his eye. "You have really pretty eyes, too. They remind me of bubblegum."

Clear giggled. "Yours remind me of caramel."

Aoba giggled, too. He was happy to be here, holding hands and flirting with Clear. He felt like he would never be lonely again as long as he had Clear by his side.

"I really like you," Aoba whispered before he knew the words were leaving his lips.

Clear's eyes went wide and his eyebrows shot up. "Y-You do?"

Aoba's cheeks burned. "Um. Yeah, I-I do."

Clear's face broke into a grin and he reached out to cradle Aoba's head in his hands. A moment later, his lips were on Aoba's; soft and sweet and strangely familiar. Aoba sighed through his nose and slid closer to Clear, carding his fingers through his wild hair. He felt Clear smile against his mouth before they separated.

"I really like you, too," Clear whispered back.

Aoba kissed him again and again and again and again until the oven timer went off and Clear had to run to the kitchen to deal with it. The kitchen was noisy for a few minutes until Clear called Aoba, telling him that dinner was ready.

Aoba walked into the dining area, finding that the atmosphere was very romantic. The lights were dimmed and there were candles on the table. Clear even held a chair out for Aoba, which was a little bit embarrassing, but overall it was nice.

"This is really good!" Aoba said through a mouthful of beef stew. "How did you know that beef stew is my favourite?"

"Someone may have told me," Clear said ominously.

Aoba chuckled, knowing exactly who that _someone_ was. "What else did Ren tell you?"

"He said that you liked sugar cookies, and that blue is your favourite colour."

"Is that all?"

"Um...he also said you were lonely. And that you talked about me a lot."

Aoba looked down at his bowl. "Oh."

"B-But don't feel bad about that!" Clear said quickly. "I'm lonely, too. Or I _was,_ anyway. Before I met you."

Aoba looked up at Clear again and smiled. "That makes me feel a little bit less pathetic."

Clear smiled, too, and the sight made Aoba feel warm inside. "I'm glad."

After dinner, Clear suggested they watch a movie. Aoba agreed it was a good idea, so Clear put something on and they sat on the couch, but neither of them paid attention to the television. Clear had kissed Aoba innocently on the cheek, so Aoba had reciprocated, and then Clear had pecked him on the lips, so Aoba had pulled him in again and kissed him with a bit more heat. One thing led to another and Aoba wound up sitting in Clear's lap. The way Clear was kissing him reminded Aoba of all the dirty things Clear had done to his body only a few months ago. They quickly grew frenzied as all the sexual tension that had built between them since they had met started to surface, and Aoba knew something was going to happen.

"Aoba-san," Clear purred, "Do you want to move to the bedroom?"

Aoba stammered for a moment. "U-Um, s-sure."

"We don't have to," Clear assured. "It just seemed like you were in the mood to go further."

Aoba shook his head quickly. "No, no, I am! I am. Let's go to your room."

Clear shut the TV off and led Aoba down the hall to his bedroom. It was just as clean and organized as Aoba had remembered.

Though they had both been feeling it when they were making out on the couch, the nerves had since set in and they stood beside the bed kind of awkwardly.

"U-Um," Clear mumbled, "I-It's been a very long time since the last time I --"

"Me, too," Aoba breathed with relief.

"A-And it was a lot different before, when --"

"I-I know."

They both paused. Then, at the same time, they both mumbled, "I'm really nervous." Then they laughed.

"Let's just...start with something small," Clear suggested quietly. Gingerly, he placed his hands on Aoba's waist and brought their bodies closer together. He kissed Aoba on the forehead, then on his nose, and finally on his lips. Aoba kissed him back, and as he did, his head flooded with a torrent of memories from their previous encounter. Back then, Clear hadn't seemed like the same person he was now; he had been more predatory and domineering. Now, he was sweet and gentle and kind.

Aoba's nerves came back, however, when Clear started to tug at the hem of his shirt. Aoba's heart was pounding in his ears; he was nervous about taking his shirt off in front of Clear. When they had had sex before, they were both very drunk, and the room was dark. Aoba was insecure about the scars on his chest that were left from his top surgery, and the stretch marks on his stomach from when he was pregnant with Ren; he was worried that Clear would think they were ugly.

Clear ended up taking his own shirt off first, which only made Aoba more anxious. Clear's chest was broad and muscular and flawless; compared to him, Aoba felt repulsive.

"Aoba-san," Clear cooed, "Why do you look so nervous? We have already seen each other before."

"I-I don't have a lot of self-confidence," Aoba admitted quietly.

Clear looked confused. "You don't? Why not? Everything about you is perfect, Aoba-san."

"You don't know that," Aoba mumbled.

"We've already been intimate!" Clear said with a slight chuckle. "I've seen you inside and out, Aoba-san, so I know that every inch of your body is perfect the way that it is."

Aoba lowered his gaze to the floor as he pulled his shirt over his head. He then dropped the bundle of fabric and crossed his arms over himself.

"Please don't hide yourself, Aoba-san," Clear whispered tenderly. "I want to see you. You're beautiful."

Aoba still didn't look at Clear, but he reluctantly lowered his arms. Clear knelt down and slowly ran his hands over Aoba's torso.

"Y-You don't mind the marks?" Aoba asked quietly.

"Of course I don't, Aoba-san. They're part of what makes you Aoba-san, so I think they're beautiful." He traced the curve of one of Aoba's scars with a series of soft kisses.

"Y-You don't need to do this," Aoba whispered as he watched Clear genuinely appreciating his body. He wasn't used to being shown so much affection and it felt strange.

Clear looked up at him and smiled. "I want to, Aoba-san." Then he started to kiss Aoba's nipple, much to Aoba's surprise. His kisses turned into licks and gentle bites, making Aoba feel a familiar heat growing between his legs. He tried to subtly grind his thighs together for some relief, but Clear noticed.

"Do you want me to touch you somewhere else, Aoba-san?"

Aoba shook his head. "N-Not yet," he said. "Stand up."

Clear stood. Aoba wanted to reciprocate the kindness Clear had showed him, so he leaned in and kissed Clear's neck as his hands danced over his body.

"I think you're beautiful, too, Clear."

"A-Aoba-san..."

Aoba unzipped Clear's pants and reached his hand inside to take his cock out. He studied it for a moment and his breath shuddered as he remembered what it felt like to have Clear inside of him.

Clear had made a soft noise so Aoba looked up, only to find him blushing heavily as he looked down at what Aoba was doing.

"What's the matter?" Aoba asked.

"N-Nothing," Clear stammered, "It's just...y-you're touching my..."

Aoba stroked Clear tentatively. "Is that okay?"

"Yes," Clear said, but he still looked embarrassed.

"Um..." Aoba murmured, not really knowing how to ask this. "C-Can I...can I put my mouth on you?"

Clear's eyes widened and he looked at Aoba in shock. "W-What? Really? You want to do that?"

Aoba nodded.

"Well, um, I mean...as long as you don't mind, Aoba-san, then I don't mind it."

Without further comment, Aoba got on his knees and took a deep breath. He held Clear at the base with one hand and cupped his balls with the other as he psyched himself up to do this. He remembered doing this to Clear last time, but he had been drunk and it seemed remarkably easier than it did now.

He figured he had been stalling long enough, so he angled Clear's cock up towards his mouth and wrapped his lips around the tip. He started to suck as he slowly took more and more of him into his mouth, but he jerked back, coughing, once it hit the back of his throat.

"Are you okay?!" Clear asked, frantic.

"Yeah," Aoba said between coughs. "You're just...really big." He laughed. "Like, _really_ big."

Clear laughed, too, and he covered his mouth with his hand. "Aoba-san, I'm...sorry?"

"I'm not," Aoba said, which made Clear laugh again.

Aoba didn't want to give up without trying again, so he used a different strategy; rather than taking Clear entirely into his mouth, he dragged his tongue up and down the length of his cock, stopping to suck at the head every so often. It wasn't as good for  
Clear as it could have been, but Clear seemed to enjoy it regardless. Aoba could feel himself throbbing between the legs as he licked all over Clear's shaft. Clear tasted so good and the sounds he was making were so erotic that Aoba was getting overwhelmed.

"A-Aoba-san, please," Clear groaned desperately, tugging at Aoba's hair. Aoba took the hint and pulled off.

"Was that okay?" Aoba asked in a voice that was a lot huskier than he expected it to be.

"It was better than okay, Aoba-san," Clear said, smiling. "Um...Can I put my mouth on you, too?"

Aoba's eyes widened and he looked off to the side. "S-Sure, I mean, if that's what you want..."

Aoba sat in the middle of the bed and tried not to stare too hard at Clear as he crawled in towards him. Clear still had his pants on, but they were unzipped enough for his cock to hang out. It glistened with a combination of precum and Aoba's saliva and Aoba found it very difficult to take his eyes off of it.

Aoba let Clear slide his pants down his legs and throw them on the floor. Now Aoba was wearing nothing but his boxers and ugly yellow socks. He suddenly felt very shy and he brought his knees together in an effort to cover himself.

Clear placed a hand on each of Aoba's knees. "Aoba-san," he murmured sweetly, "You want to do it, don't you?"

Aoba lowered his gaze. "Y-Yeah, I do."

"Then you musn't be shy!" He pulled Aoba's legs apart, making Aoba scoff in embarrassment.

"C-Clear!"

"Aoba-san," Clear said in reply. He nuzzled against the inside of Aoba's thigh and mouthed wetly at the skin. He kissed lower and lower, nudging the fabric of Aoba's underwear further up his leg until he was nearly at the juncture of his thighs.

Clear then slipped a finger under the fabric and dragged it along Aoba's outer lip. Aoba inhaled a shaky gasp, but he didn't protest, so Clear pulled Aoba's underwear to the side so his tongue could trace the same path his finger had. Aoba moaned softly in the back of his throat and relaxed his body against the bed. Clear read his cue and hooked his fingers in Aoba's waistband, slowly pulling the garment down his legs and tossing it with the rest of their clothes on the floor.

Aoba's cheeks burned as he felt Clear looking at his naked body, but he liked having Clear's eyes on him despite the embarrassment, so he inched his own legs further apart. Clear's eyes widened and he placed his palms on Aoba's inner thighs, gently stroking his thumbs over his labia.

"You're so beautiful," Clear whispered so quietly that Aoba could hardly hear him. He then ducked in and licked all the way up Aoba's crease.

"Clear!" Aoba cried, grabbing at Clear's hair.

Clear didn't hesitate. He took Aoba's clit between his lips and sucked on it gently, lapping at it with his tongue. Aoba threw his head back and groaned.

"C-Clear...!"

Aoba felt Clear's tongue tracing around his lips before plunging deep within him. Clear swirled his tongue around the first few inches of Aoba's opening, licking up the slick that had gathered there.

Aoba could hardly believe what was happening. He couldn't remember the last time someone had done this to him. Not only that; Clear was moaning and making soft sounds through his nose as if it were a privilege to be able to go down on Aoba.

Clear pushed Aoba’s thighs up as he started to inch his mouth further down. Aoba gasped when he felt Clear’s tongue drag over his other hole.

Clear pulled back. "Are you alright? Is everything I'm doing okay?"

Aoba nodded, trying to keep it together. "Yeah. It just...it's really good." His voice sounded thick with emotion. "Please keep going."

Clear returned his attention to Aoba's hole, laving it with his tongue, though he kept stroking Aoba's labia with his fingers. He reached for the lube after a few minutes and coated his fingers before inserting two into each of his openings.

Aoba was on a whole other plane of reality. He could have stayed there forever with Clear licking between his legs, but he knew there was something else they needed to do, so he tugged Clear's hair and told him to stop.

“Was it good, Aoba-san?” Clear asked after wiping his mouth with his arm.

“Yeah, it was...really good, actually, but I want you to...go...inside.”

“Oh.” Clear's eyes widened. “Right. Um.” He cleared his throat. "Where do you want me to put it? I know we did it here last time," Clear said as he rubbed Aoba's slit with his thumb, "but it's still your decision."

“Uh...You can put it there again. The other way takes too much time and I'm impatient."

"Okay. Let me know if you change your mind, Aoba-san." He reached for a condom, but Aoba stopped him.

"Y-You don't need one. It's okay."

"R-Really? Are you sure?"

Aoba chuckled and shook his head with exasperation. "Trust me! I don't want me getting pregnant, either."

Clear got in position, visibly swallowing with what Aoba assumed was nervousness. Clear took Aoba's hand in his own as he slid in. Aoba groaned softly as he felt the fullness of Clear's cock inside of him, opening him up and rubbing against him deliciously. Aoba moaned into Clear's ear as he started to move, angling his hips in such a way that hit Aoba's most sensitive spots.

"Aoba-san," Clear rasped. "You feel so wet..."

In that moment, Aoba didn't have an ounce of shame in his body, so he didn't mind hearing Clear say that. He mouthed at Clear's jaw and said, "It's because of you."

Clear exhaled hotly but otherwise didn't reply. He fucked Aoba slowly, drawing out his movements so Aoba could feel absolutely everything. They were only a few minutes in and Aoba was already feeling his orgasm approaching. It had been a very long time since Aoba had last done this (sober), so it wasn't going to take much to push him over the edge.

"Clear," Aoba whispered, "This is kind of embarrassing, but...I-I'm gonna come soon."

"There's nothing embarrassing about that at all, Aoba-san," Clear assured. "I'm glad I am able to make you feel good."

It took less than five minutes for Aoba to come, and when he did, he lost control of his voice and cried out Clear's name loud enough for the neighbours across the street to hear. Clear mouthed at his jaw and murmured sweet words into his ear until it was over.

Aoba expected Clear to pull out and just jerk himself off or something, but Clear kept moving.

“You can stop i-if you want,” Aoba mumbled. “I’ll take care of it for you.”

One side of Clear's mouth turned up in a half-smile. “Why would I stop, Aoba-san? I want to make you come again.”

Aoba's eyes widened. He turned his head to the side in an effort to hide his face in the pillow. “O-Okay…”

Clear started to slow down, and then he stopped and pulled out. Aoba was _really_ confused until Clear asked him to roll over onto his stomach. Aoba turned himself over and raised himself up on his knees so his ass was in the air. Clear rubbed the head of his cock along Aoba's now-dripping slit a few times before pushing in again.

“I figured it would be more pleasurable for you if we did it like this,” Clear purred against Aoba’s neck. He slid his hand down the front of Aoba’s body until his fingers reached his clit, which he began to stroke in time with his thrusts.

Clear was definitely going to make Aoba come too soon again. Clear was doing all the right things and Aoba was so hazy with lust that his orgasm snuck up on him. He was coming before he knew it. Clear came at the same time, though, so Aoba wasn't embarrassed. The feeling of Clear coming inside of him heightened the intensity of it and he couldn't help but moan Clear's name again.

Aoba was absolutely exhausted when Clear pulled out. His knees were shaking so he let his hips flop back down onto the mattress. Clear lay down beside him again and kissed him sweetly on the nose.

“Did you enjoy it?” Clear asked softly as he rubbed Aoba's back.

“Yeah,” Aoba said, grinning. “That was nuts. Nobody's ever made me come that fast before.”

Clear grinned, too, and chuckled.

Aoba realized that this was what he had been needing ever since that first night with Clear. All he had wanted was this closeness, and as he smiled at Clear and saw Clear smiling back, he never wanted it to stop. Aoba still hadn't made any promises to Clear, but he couldn't ignore the warmth he felt through his whole body. Being with Clear felt right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have never written smut with vaginas before this and i struggled to come up with good euphemisms


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of the end!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a super short chapter because it was gonna be the last chapter but it got too long. so i split it in half and now the next chapter is the last chapter. also sorry it took me like 3 months to update

Ever since their second-first date, Aoba and Clear had been spending a lot more time together. They visited each other at work whenever they could, and they went out together at least once a week. The chemistry between them was remarkable, which reflected in their sex life. They hardly ever spent time alone together without engaging in some kind of sexual activity.

Tonight's date was no exception.

As they cuddled in post-coital bliss in the back of Clear's car, Aoba felt mildly ashamed of himself. He kept going out with Clear and kissing him and _having sex with him_ but he still hadn't actually told him that he wanted a relationship. Clear was a real trooper for putting up with Aoba’s bullshit.

“We should put our clothes back on,” Clear murmured after pressing a kiss to Aoba’s bare shoulder. “We could get arrested for this.”

Clear was right. The windows had (embarrassingly enough) fogged up while they were going at it, but they were starting to clear up, putting them at risk of being caught. Aoba sat up to look for their clothes, but he saw some people walk past the car so he flopped back down on top of Clear, pushing him back against the car seat.

“There are people outside!” Aoba whisper-shouted. “I think they saw me!”

“Oh, no,” Clear said with a sarcastic tone in his voice, “Does that mean we’ll have to snuggle naked until we’re sure there's nobody around? We could be here for hours!” He squeezed his arms around Aoba's waist. “This is the worst thing that's ever happened to me.”

“You're an idiot,” Aoba murmured affectionately, ruffling Clear's hair with his hand.

Aoba was so close to telling Clear that he loved him, but something stopped him. He was scared. He didn't know why; Clear had made it very clear that he wanted to be with Aoba as long as Aoba wanted to be with him, too. There was nothing for Aoba to be afraid of.

Still, he couldn't do it. He wondered if he’d ever be ready.

*     *     *

“Papa!” Ren greeted Aoba when he came home. He was playing a board game with Koujaku and Noiz. “How was your date?”

Aoba smiled and patted Ren on the head. “It was nice.”

“Are you and Kurage-sensei dating now?”

Aoba heaved a sigh. “I don’t know, sweetie. We didn’t talk about that.”

“You didn't talk? Then what were you doing all that time?”

Aoba blushed profusely. “U-U-Um, w-well, we didn’t do anything in particular…”

Ren bombarded Aoba with question after question which only served to make him more flustered. Eventually he just sent Ren off to clean his room so he wouldn’t have to answer.

Koujaku and Noiz smirked at Aoba as soon as Ren was out of earshot.

“What's that on your neck, Aoba?” Noiz asked.

Aoba’s hands flew up to cover his neck. “What? N-Nothing!”

“There's nothing on your neck,” Koujaku said after punching Noiz on the arm. “He's just being an asshole.”

Aoba punched Noiz on the arm, too.

“It seems like things are getting pretty serious, though,” Koujaku noted. “With you and Clear, I mean.”

Aoba cringed. “Uh, I haven't actually told him I want to be, like, in a relationship…”

“What?”

“I thought you liked him?”

“I do!” Aoba assured. “I really like him. I, um...kinda love him, actually.”

“Then what's the problem?” Noiz asked.

“I don't know!” Aoba exclaimed, but then he paused and added in a calmer tone, “I just don't want to get hurt again. I don't want to give Ren hope that he’s gonna have another father and then have to take that away from him.”

“Do you think Clear's gonna do that to you guys?”

Aoba sighed. “No. He's promised me that if I want to be with him, he’ll stay with me.”

“Aoba,” Koujaku said softly, patting him on the shoulder. “You should tell him how you feel. It's obvious you want to be with him.”

“You guys are right.”

“So you're gonna tell him?”

“Uh…” Aoba hesitated for a second. “Sure.”

Koujaku and Noiz eventually got so frustrated with Aoba's indecision that they left. Their words had really got to Aoba, though, so he resolved to tell Clear how he felt the next time he saw him. He felt less sure about it when he realized the next time he saw him would be the next day, when he brought Ren over to play with Rei and Ami. Despite that, he still planned on doing it. He had to do it eventually, right?

*     *     *

Aoba was so nervous when he and Ren knocked on Clear’s door that he could feel the bile rising up his throat. He was finally going tell Clear how he felt about him! 

“Aoba-san!” Clear practically sang when he opened the door. He pulled Aoba tightly into a hug and lifted him into the air, spinning him around. “I’m so happy to see you!” He lowered Aoba back to the floor and turned to Ren. “And Ren-kun! I'm happy to see you, too, but I won't give you a hug like that.”

Aoba's face was still burning from the humiliation of being so affectionate with Clear in front of Ren (who didn't seem embarrassed in the slightest at having seen the shameful display). Luckily, Rei and Ami came to greet them, providing a distraction. Just before they tugged Ren away as they usually did, though, they paused to ask Clear something.

“Is it okay if we use the piano, daddy?”

Clear looked puzzled for a moment. “Uh...sure!”

“Yay! Thank you!” The three children sprinted down the hall.

“What could they be doing with the piano?” Aoba wondered.

“I don’t know,” Clear said with a shrug. “Rei and Ami take piano lessons, so maybe they want to show Ren how to play.”

They sat on the couch and chatted idly for a while, but eventually, Aoba decided to bite the bullet and get this over with. Since their kids were busy and they were unlikely to be interrupted, he slid closer to Clear nonchalantly and placed a hand on his knee.

“So, Clear...I was thinking, um...well, we haven’t really talked about this yet, but I wanted to tell you that --”

“Daddy! Aoba-san! There’s something we wanna show you!”

Clear looked to the hallway. “We’ll be right there!” He called. Then he turned to Aoba again and said, “I’m sorry. What were you saying?”

Aoba shook his head. “It’s not important.”

“Yes, it is! I want to know!”

Aoba pursed his lips. “I’ll tell you later, okay?”

The kids ended up showing them a musical number they created. It was cute to watch. Ren tapped out a beat on an inverted plastic container while Rei played the piano and Ami sang. When it was finished, the adults applauded with enthusiasm.

“That was amazing!” Clear raved. “Did you come up with that yourselves?”

“Yeah!”

“You did a really good job,” Aoba praised.

The children beamed with pride. Then Ami told Clear and Aoba to get out so they could practice some more. Before they left, though, Clear asked the kids if they were hungry. They said yes, so Clear enlisted Aoba to help him prepare something.

While they worked side-by-side in the kitchen, Aoba felt genuinely happy. He felt like he could spend every day of his life like this. Though he was a little bit embarrassed to admit it to himself so casually, he loved Clear a lot, and any reluctance he had about starting a relationship with him had nearly faded.

“What are you smiling about?” Clear teased, poking Aoba’s cheek with his finger.

On an impulse, Aoba snatched Clear’s head in his hands and kissed him. Clear made a sound of shock, but he quickly started to reciprocate. Aoba wrapped his arms around Clear’s waist and brought their bodies very close together. He didn’t care if their kids caught them.

“Aoba-san,” Clear whispered once they parted.

“I, um...I was thinking.” Aoba cleared his throat. “And, um, I...wanna...be with you. Like, I want us to, like...be in a thing. A relationship.” He swallowed. “And...I love you.”

Clear stared at Aoba for a few seconds, his face a picture of absolute shock. “What?”

Aoba pursed his lips and glared at Clear. “Y-You heard me, didn't you?”

Clear exhaled a shaky breath and his lips slowly curled into a smile. “You love me?”

Aoba hushed him. “Don't say that so loud!”

Clear giggled. “You love me!”

Aoba huffed. “Shut up!”

“Oh, Aoba-san!” Clear placed his hands on his chest as if he were swooning. “I love you, too!”

Aoba tried to keep his annoyed expression, but he couldn't. His face broke into a grin and he laughed. “So you're serious about what you said before? You really want to be with me?”

“I will stay with you forever, Aoba-san.” He paused. “Um, that is, i-if you want me to. I won't stalk you or anything if you ever want to break up.”

Aoba laughed again, softly, and scruffed Clear's hair with his hand. “I doubt I’d ever want you to leave.”

Clear smiled again, even brighter than the last time, and kissed Aoba so passionately that he forgot his own name.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gay


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. i apologize that this took so long 
> 
> 2\. there is sex in this chapter

"Aoba-san! You'll never guess what Ren-kun did today."

Aoba grimaced. He was glad Clear couldn't see his expression over the phone. "Is it bad?"

"No, not at all! Our school is having a talent show and Ren signed up to perform with Rei and Ami!"

"But Rei and Ami go to a different school," Aoba said in confusion. Clear's brother's will stated that the money he had was to be used for his children's education, so they were able to attend an expensive private school, unlike Ren.

"I was able to make an exception! I think it is very good for Ren-kun to be pushing the limits of his comfort zone."

Aoba hummed in agreement. "What's he gonna do?"

"He told me they are planning on singing. The show is this Friday at seven o'clock. Will you be able to make it? I know it would mean a lot to Ren-kun."

"Yeah, I can go. I don't work on Friday. Will...um...will you be there?"

"Yes, I will."

"O-Okay. Well, um, I guess I'll see you then."

"I'm looking forward to it, Aoba-san!"

Aoba smiled. "Yeah. Me, too."

Ren said he needed to spend a lot of time practicing for the show, which basically meant he had to bang on inverted plastic tubs over and over again. Aoba didn't want to crush Ren’s spirit because he could tell how excited he was about it, so he let him do what he wanted and dealt with the migraines as they came.

When the night of the talent show arrived, though, Ren seemed very nervous, especially when he had to leave Aoba to go backstage with the other performers. Aoba gave him a reassuring hug and wished him luck before going to find Clear in the audience.

“Ah! Seragaki-san! I saved you a seat!” Clear called. Aoba turned to the source of the sound and saw him waving with a polite smile.

“Thanks,” Aoba said once he sat down. “But why are you calling me --” Aoba cut himself off when he realized they were surrounded by Clear’s coworkers (who were absolutely not to know about their relationship). He cleared his throat. “Um. Nevermind. It’s nice to see you, um...Kurage-san.”

Clear giggled and brushed his fingers against Aoba’s discreetly. Aoba wished he could have held his hand, but it was too risky. He also wished he could have told Clear how handsome he looked in the sweater he was wearing, or maybe even given him a little kiss on the cheek, but he had to restrain himself. It was torture.

Aoba saw Clear pull his phone out of his pocket and fiddle with it for a few seconds. Almost instantly, he felt his own phone vibrate in his pocket. With a suspicious glance at his boyfriend, he checked his phone. Sure enough, there was a text from Clear.

“You look very beautiful tonight, Aoba-san! I want to kiss you all over your cute little face, but I cannot. This is very hard for me.”

Aoba blushed as he read the message. After checking over his shoulder to make sure nobody could see the screen, he typed a reply.

“You’ll just have to make up for it later ;)”

He contemplated the winky face for a second, but ultimately decided to keep it in. He chuckled to himself as Clear opened the message, awaiting a reply.

“I will kiss more than just your face later, Aoba-san.”

Luckily, the lights dimmed and the emcee came out just then, so Aoba didn't have to reply. It was probably for the best considering how they were borderline sexting.

Ren and the girls were several acts in, so Aoba had to sit through a bunch of performances by kids he didn't know. It sucked. He didn't want to watch other people's kids dance terribly and sing terribly and do terrible magic tricks. Ren's performance was definitely going to be the only good one.

Clear squeezed Aoba’s hand in excitement when their children finally came on stage. Aoba smiled to himself as Ren set up his buckets while Rei and Ami tried to bring the microphones down to the proper height. They were so cute! They were so much cuter than anyone else’s dumb kids.

“I’m Ami,” Ami said into the microphone once it was adjusted, “and this is my sister Rei and my brother Ren.”

Aoba and Clear both tensed.

“We wrote a song and we’re going to play it now!” She concluded. The audience clapped.

“Did she really just say that?” Clear whispered (very quietly) in Aoba's ear.

Aoba looked at Clear with wide eyes, still in shock.

Their exchange was cut short when Ren started to count in on his bucket drums, catching their attention. Aoba watched the performance in awe. They wrote that song! They were kids and they wrote a song! It was incredible!

When it was over, both Clear and Aoba shot up out of their seats and cheered like maniacs. Some people turned and looked at them like they were crazy, but Aoba didn't care. It had clearly taken a lot of courage for Ren to have done that, and he wanted Ren to know how proud he was.

Clear offered to drive Aoba and Ren home so they didn't have to take the bus. During the ride, Aoba took the opportunity to ask Ami why she had said Ren was her brother. Ami’s response was that, someday, he would be, so she didn't think there was anything wrong with saying it now. Aoba couldn't think of a valid argument against it.

"Can we have a sleepover at Aoba-san's house?" Rei asked. “To celebrate what a good job we did?”

"Uh..." Clear looked to Aoba. "I'm not sure."

Aoba shrugged. "It's okay with me."

The three children in the backseat cheered.

"Why don't you stay at Aoba-san’s, too, daddy? You like Aoba-san, don't you?"

"You talk a lot about how much you like Aoba-san, daddy."

Clear chuckled bashfully. "I-I don't know if that's a very good idea."

"I wouldn't mind if you stayed," Aoba mumbled.

"See?" Rei said. "Aoba-san wants you to sleep over!"

So, after going back to Clear's apartment to get the things they needed, they all headed to Aoba's house. For most of the night, the children watched cartoons and played video games while Clear and Aoba kept an eye on them from the sofa (though they were lured in to participate every so often). They let them stay up pretty late, but they eventually had to send the kids to bed.

Once the children were tucked in, Aoba and Clear were alone. It actually was pretty late, and they had had a long day, so Aoba suggested they go to bed, too.

"Do you want me to sleep on the couch?" Clear asked.

"N-No," Aoba mumbled. "You can sleep with -- I mean, you can sleep in my bed. With me. Um, if you want."

"A-Aoba-san," Clear whispered. "Is that a good idea? What will the kids think if they see us?"

"It's not that big of a deal," Aoba murmured. "I mean, they’re okay with us being...together, right?"

Clear hummed thoughtfully. "They don't actually know that yet.”

"We can talk to them about it tomorrow, if you want.”

Clear’s eyes widened slightly. “Really?”

“Sure, why not?”

Clear grinned. "Does this mean I can call you my boyfriend?"

"I-I guess so, yeah..."

"And I can hold your hand in public?"

"Uh...sure..."

"And I'm allowed to kiss you in front of our kids?"

Aoba's eyes narrowed. "No."

After they brushed their teeth, they went into Aoba's bedroom. This was the first time Aoba had let Clear see his room, and for good reason; it was small and disorganized and had a stale kind of smell in the air.

Aoba turned the light off and shuffled out of his clothes so that he was left in his underwear. Apparently, Clear liked to sleep the same way, because Aoba could see in the dimness of the room that he had undressed, too.

When they crawled into bed, Aoba felt Clear's arm coil around his waist and pull him back until they were spooning.

"You're very warm, Aoba-san," Clear whispered as he pressed a series of chaste kisses down the side of Aoba's neck.

Aoba could feel Clear's heartbeat against his back. He let his eyes fall shut as he listened to Clear's steady breathing. "So are you."

Aoba was perfectly content to fall asleep like that, but he couldn't stop thinking about how Clear was half-naked and pressed up against him, so he gradually inched his hips back until the curves of his body were nestled snugly into Clear's. He took Clear's hand and brought it up to his lips so he could kiss each of his fingers. On an impulse, he slipped Clear's index finger past his lips and gently sucked on it.

"Aoba-san," Clear whispered, sounding half aroused and half confused.

Aoba didn't say anything in reply; he just swayed his hips back rhythmically against Clear. After a while, he felt Clear's cock start to stiffen.

"Aoba-san," Clear repeated with a hint of a plea in his voice.

Aoba brought Clear's hand down to the front of his waistband, instead, and guided his fingers under it. Clear took the hint and slid two of his fingers between Aoba's lips, tentatively stroking his clit. With his other hand, he pushed Aoba's underwear down until they were past his knees.

"Take yours off, too," Aoba murmured desperately. He felt Clear shuffle around a bit, and then he felt the hot hardness of Clear's cock against his ass.

Clear's fingers resumed their task between Aoba's legs, so Aoba started to grind back against Clear again because he didn't want to be the only one enjoying it. Aoba could feel Clear's cock dripping against his lower back.

Clear was still spooning Aoba when he slipped his cock between Aoba's legs, pushing just the head past Aoba's opening.

"Fuck," Aoba cursed under his breath. He pushed his hips back until he had taken Clear in as far as he could.

Clear hugged Aoba tightly as he thrusted into him. He snaked one hand down to rub Aoba's clit, too, while he moved.

"How does it feel, Aoba-san?" Clear asked tenderly.

"R-Really good," Aoba sighed, tilting his head so Clear could kiss his neck.

The bed creaked slightly as they moved together, and every so often the bedframe would smack against the wall. Aoba didn't think it was loud enough to draw attention, but he also really didn't want the kids to hear them fucking, so he tried to keep his moans as quiet as possible.

After several minutes of bliss, Clear pulled out, making Aoba look behind him in confusion. Clear had an embarrassed look on his face.

"What are you doing?"

“Um, Aoba-san…you can say no if you want to, but…” He cleared his throat. “Can I...put it here?”

Aoba had no idea what Clear was talking about until he felt Clear's finger circle his other hole. He stammered in embarrassment.

“S-Sure…”

“Are you sure, Aoba-san? I won't be angry if you say no. I understand that some people don't like doing it that way.”

“N-No, I...um…I like it.”

“You like it?”

Aoba nodded.

Clear grinned. “Aoba-san, I had no idea you were so kinky!”

After swatting Clear on the arm for his comment, Aoba told him where the lube was. A few seconds later, Clear was rubbing a slick fingertip against his entrance.

“Just put it in already,” Aoba mumbled. “I don't need you to ease me into it.”

Clear responded by pushing two fingers into Aoba’s hole. “Is that okay?”

“Yes,” Aoba gasped into Clear's ear. “Put another one in.”

As Clear worked him open, Aoba couldn't help but get a bit emotional. It was the most intimate situation they had been in so far. He was just so happy to be comfortable trusting Clear with something like this.

“I’m okay now,” Aoba murmured after a few minutes. “You can go in.”

Clear exhaled a shaky breath. It sounded full of anticipation. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Clear gently flipped Aoba over so he was lying on his other side and they were facing each other. He hiked one of Aoba's legs up so it was curled around his waist, then entered him slowly so Aoba could get used to it. The position meant that they were pressed against each other closely. Once Aoba had adjusted, Clear shifted his legs slightly and started to move his hips.

Aoba buried his face in Clear's neck, muffling his moans and kissing him every so often.

"I-I love you, Aoba-san," Clear whispered softly.

Aoba felt like he was going to cry. Clear was being so nice and gentle and Aoba could tell that Clear really did love him. He squeezed his arms around Clear tighter, keeping his nose pressed against Clear's shoulder until he regained his composure. He looked up into Clear's eyes after a few seconds and said, softly, "I love you, too, Clear."

Clear beamed and his eyes got a little watery. He slotted his fingers in Aoba's hair and brought their mouths together passionately.

Clear came first, which made Aoba feel a little bit better about how he always seemed to come so quickly. Aoba felt Clear tense up, then heard him moan against the pillow. After a moment, he felt Clear’s come spurting out inside of him. It was oddly satisfying.

When Aoba climaxed, he felt a small amount of liquid burst out of him. He was so overwhelmed with pleasure and feelings of love that he hadn't thought much of it. Once he came down from his high, however, he realized what had happened and he covered his mouth in humiliation.

“O-Oh my god! I'm so sorry! I...got it on you…”

Clear chuckled. “It’s okay, Aoba-san. I got it _in_ you, didn't I?”

Aoba nestled in closer to Clear. He hadn't yet removed his leg from where it rested on Clear’s hip and he honestly didn’t want to. Clear's softening cock was still inside of him.

“Aoba-san,” Clear murmured, “You should get cleaned up, right? I don't want you to get an infection.”

Aoba grumbled. “Five more minutes.”

“Aoba-san,” Clear scolded, though he laughed when he said it.

Aoba felt so warm and safe with Clear in his arms. He had been lonely for so long that he felt himself quickly getting overwhelmed by all the affection. Just when he thought he would be able to maintain his composure, Clear brought Aoba's hand up to his mouth and kissed the back of it. Aoba started ugly-crying almost immediately, wheezing like an injured cat and trying desperately to hide his face from Clear.

"A-Aoba-san?!"

"I'm s-sorry!" Aoba wailed. "I've just been so l-lonely and now you're here a-and I'm so happy I found you!"

Clear held Aoba tightly against his chest, stroking his hair and softly hushing him. "Don't apologize. I'm happy that you feel comfortable expressing your emotions with me." He kissed the top of Aoba's head. "I've been lonely, too, Aoba-san. Ever since the first time we slept together, I haven't been able to stop thinking about how wonderful it felt to be next to you. I was so happy when you said you wanted to be with me; I knew I loved you, and it thrilled me to think that you might have felt the same way."

"I do," Aoba murmured. "I do feel the same way." He looked into Clear's eyes. “I love you.”

Clear kissed Aoba's tears away. “I love you, too, Aoba-san.” He pulled Aoba's head closer to his chest again and stroked his hair.

Aoba listened to Clear's heartbeat, letting the constant rhythm lull him back to a calm state.

*     *     *

In the morning, Aoba woke up and found himself alone in his bed. He rolled out and slid his feet into his slippers, heading out into the hallway in search of Clear. He found him in the kitchen.

"Aoba-san! Good morning!" He said with a blinding smile. "I hope you don't mind, but I'm making breakfast. I would have asked you but you looked so cute when you were asleep! I didn't want to disturb you."

"I don't mind at all," Aoba assured. "I appreciate it. Thank you."

Their kids weren't up yet, so Aoba walked over and wrapped his arms around Clear's waist. While they were hugging, though, Aoba noticed some telltale markings on Clear's neck.

"Oh my God," Aoba whispered in absolute horror. "You have hickeys on your neck!"

"What? Really?" Clear reached up to his neck as if he would be able to feel the marks with his fingers.

"Yeah!" Aoba pulled back in a panic. "What if the kids see?"

"I don't think they know what those are, Aoba-san."

"Whatever," Aoba grumbled. "Do I have any on me?"

"Of course you do, Aoba-san! You have a very kissable neck."

Aoba scoffed and narrowed his eyes in annoyance. “Whatever. I'm gonna put a turtleneck on. I’ll get you a scarf.”

When Aoba returned to the kitchen in a turtleneck sweater with a scarf in hand, he saw that the Clear and the children were sitting at the table, apparently waiting for him. Aoba quickly covered Clear's neck with the scarf and sat down next to him.

“So,” Clear said after swallowing a bite of waffle, “Aoba-san and I have something exciting to tell you!”

Rei blinked curiously. “Are you taking us to Disneyland?”

Clear chuckled. “No, sweetie. Aoba-san and I officially a couple now!”

The children gasped.

“Does this mean you're getting married?”

“Are we all gonna live together?”

“Can I be the flower girl at your wedding?”

“Hey! I wanna be the flower girl!”

“I think you can both be flower girls.”

“But what will you be, Ren-kun?”

“He can be a flower girl too!”

“Wait, wait!” Aoba said over the kids’ excited chattering. “We’re not getting married!”

“Not _yet,”_ Clear added with a smile.

“And it's too early for us to live together!”

“Why do you say that, Aoba-san?” Ami asked. “You and daddy love each other, don't you?”

Aoba felt himself blush. “Yes, but --”

“She has a point, Aoba-san,” Clear agreed. “Your house is very small, and it is far away from where you work. Wouldn't it make more sense to live with us?”

Aoba couldn't believe this. “Are you seriously asking me to move in with you?”

Clear’s smile didn't falter. “Why not?”

“We’ve only been dating for a month!”

“And yet it feels like I’ve known you a lifetime,” Clear said with a dreamy sigh.

“You're ridiculous.”

Clear giggled. “If you don't want to, you don't have to. It's okay.”

Aoba sighed, thinking about it for a moment. “No, you're right. It's a good idea.”

Clear’s eyes widened and he blinked. “W-What did you say?”

“I said it’s a good idea. We should live together.”

“What? Really?”

“Why do you look so surprised? You're the one that brought it up!”

“I-I didn't think you would actually say yes!”

“What? Do you not actually want to?”

“No, I do! I do! I just didn't expect this!”

Aoba laughed at Clear's silliness. He turned his attention to the kids and asked, “Is that alright with you guys?”

He was met with a resounding _“Yes!”_.

Later that day, once their company had gone home, Aoba sat with Ren on the couch as they watched Spongebob. During a commercial break, he nudged Ren to get his attention.

“Are you really okay with moving in with Clear? If you're not, we won't do it. I’ll come up with an excuse not to.” He paused. “I know it's a lot to ask of you so soon.”

Ren looked up at him. “I’m okay with it. I know that we’re a family with just the two of us, but I think we’ll all be happier if we’re together.”

Aoba smiled and pulled Ren into his lap so he could hug him. Ren hugged him back.

Ren’s situation had improved a lot since Clear first expressed his concern about him. Aoba didn't know how much of that was due to the recent changes in his life, but he wanted to believe that having more people to rely on was a good thing for Ren.

Aoba had to go to work that evening, so Koujaku and Noiz came over to watch Ren for what would probably be the last time. He explained to them that he wouldn't need their services because Clear would be there in the evenings to watch Ren while Aoba was at work.

“Oh,” Koujaku said. He actually sounded disappointed. “I understand.”

“Jeez,” Noiz grumbled, elbowing Koujaku in the side. “It’s not like the kid’s dying. We can still come see him, right?”

Aoba assured them that they were welcome to visit whenever they wanted. After all, Ren would miss them, too. And they still hadn't met Clear yet!

Noiz scoffed. “Like I’d want to have to watch you and your boyfriend act gay together.”

“I have to watch you two act gay together all the time!” Aoba countered. _“And_ I have to pay you!”

Noiz didn't argue further.

*     *     *

As Aoba ate dinner with his pseudo-family for the first time since moving in with them, Ren surprised him with a question.

“Papa,” he said, “When Clear arranged a meeting with you at school for the first time, you seemed like you already knew each other.” He paused, looking between  
the two of them inquisitively. “How did you two _actually_ meet?”

Aoba choked so hard on a piece of broccoli that he nearly passed out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope u liked the ending also hmu on tumblr, my url is clearw0ru now and i post a lot of shitty art

**Author's Note:**

> yo thanks for reading, hmu on tumblr @skittybitty :3c


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